It's only half past the point of no return*

I have little burns on all of my finger tips and on the tip of my tongue.  I have two new zits that weren't there when I went to bed last night and a chip on my fingernail.  I have a little hollow place inside of my heart that I'm trying to fill with love and laughter and words and hugs but it doesn't stay full.

I have scars on my skin and my soul but I also have a little smirk on my mouth because even though you won't say so, I think we might be more than friends.

I have songs stuck in my head and on my lips and on my fingers and on my toes but I think I'll keep them there.  I have brains in my head and feet in my shoes, and moonlight bleeding from out of my soul and words melting on my tongue.

I like the way they taste.

I have the touch of your hands on mine and the feel of your head on my shoulder even though you're not there anymore.  I have butterflies in my stomach and goosebumps on my arms and legs and the back of my neck.

Only they're the good kind of goosebumps.  The kind where I'm excited and nervous at the same time.

"Who'd have known
when you flash up on my phone
I no longer feel alone."


Love and kisses,
Dani

*I definitely checked my watch to figure that one out.  I may have even done a few quick calculations.  Because, you know... that's completely relevant...

You must be the reason I'm alive

You know that moment when you pass him in the hall and he stops to say hi and give you a hug, and you're grinning like a cheshire cat all the way to your next class?

Or when you have to open his locker for him because he can never open it on the first try.

Or when he walks you to 4th period everyday after lunch.

When he texts you just to ask if you're feeling okay.


When he hugs you and your head is on his chest


or when he plays with your hands.


When he shares his coke and m&ms even though you're sick and afflicted.


When he misses his bus because he's talking to you for too long, and then he sits and talks to you for a while longer even though you both have somewhere to be.

"When i'm with you
you know you make my days
so beautiful
with your different ways
you make me lighter
i'm movin with the wind"

Love and kisses,
Dani

Day 4: Food

I ate some food today.

I bought a new swimsuit. It was on sale for $15! It's a one piece, which I was originally a bit apprehensive about, but it ended up being really cute on me.

So I have a secret to tell you if you really want to hear about it... Oh all right I'll tell you.

I don't hate him anymore.

And that's all.

:)

Love and kisses!
Dani

everything's gonna be alright

dark room full of people, and lights flashing on the walls, the ceiling, people's faces. everyone is laughing, singing, dancing along with the music but i can't seem to say anything. so i stand awkwardly, too far away from you. i don't speak, you don't speak and we wait in silence until i am dragged away. i'm scared to make the first move, but scared that you won't, and i wish i could know what you're thinking.

how is it that you can be disappointed even if you have very low expectations?

but then i turn, you smile, you speak, we dance, we talk, we laugh, we hug, and when you walk away, i'm still smiling.

Grrrrrrrrr...

2.It's raining today.

3.I have the worlds ugliest hair.

4.I left my iPod at home.

5.That's okay it doesn't have the song I want anyway.

6.Apparently I'm a big fan of making lists when I can't think of anything to say.

7.That's because when I make lists I can do my 2nd of all crap.

8.Which makes me happy.

9.Because he makes me happy.

10.Now go hug someone.

Now go hug someone.

Fact. I was secretly disappointed when I turned 11 and never got a Hogwarts acceptance letter.

Fact. Sometimes I throw temper tantrums. But only to myself.

Fact. This is my 4th attempt to post on this blog today.

Fact. I can't think of what to say.

Fact. I don't like cottage cheese.

Fact. I don't like it when my bedroom door is open.

Fact. I made a new(well sorta) friend(well kinda) today. Actually and old friend(kinda) that I haven't talked to in years. And we just sort of talked to each other.
Here take a picture. I thought it was pretty.

Once we decorated the Feilbach's driveway with chalk once. I wrote everyone's names all big and beautiful and Brenna drew a magic unicorn with a very long rainbow tail that wrapped around everyones names. It was one of the best things I've ever done. I kind of adore sidewalk chalk.

(p.s. i also wrote his name really tiny in the corner... in yellow)

Gray or Blue

I feel so helpless now, my guitar is not around
And I'm strugglin with the xylophone to make these feelings sound
And I'm remembering you singing and bringing you to life
It's raining out the window and today it looks like night

You haven't written to me in a week I'm wondering why that is
Are you too nervous to be lovers, friendships ruined with just one kiss
I watched you very closely I saw you look away
Your eyes are either gray or blue I'm never close enough to say

But your sweatshirt says it all with the hood over your face
I can't keep staring at your mouth without wondering how it tastes
I'm with another boy; he's asleep, I'm wide awake
And he tried to win my heart, but it's taken time

I know the shape of your hands because I watch them when you talk
And I know the shape of your body 'cause I watch it when you walk
And I want to know it all but im giving you the lead
So go on, go on and take it, don't fake it, shake it

Don't second guess your feelings you were right form the start
And I notice she's your lover, but she's nowhere near your heart
This city is for strangers, like the sky is for the stars
But I think it's very dangerous if we do not take whats ours

I'm winning you with words because I have no other way
I want to look into your face without your eyes turnin away
Last night I watched you sing because a person has to try
And I walked home in the rain because a person cannot lie

Take a look at the total!

We went to coldstone, he and I. And plenty of other people... But we still went to coldstone and it was lovely.

2nd of All

I miss you. And I want to talk to you.

3rd: I need more iTunes giftcards

4th: I smiled a lot today

5th: And I laughed

6th: And we're having a carmel-apple-making-Letters-to-Juliet-ice-cream-eating party tonight

7th: So I'm really doing okay, you know?

Problem-ito

Are you excited? Are you excited for me to tell you about my wonderful fabulous story? Are you ready for me to announce something completely life-shattering and inspiring? Are you ready to read an incredible riviting story that you won't be able to tear your eyes away from?

Yep me too. I'll let you know when that happens alright?

Well my friends, here's my problemo (problem-ito)... I-ito have-ito no-ito story-itos. Cuz he doesn't go to my school. Which is a problem-ito.

And how can I have a blog-ito with no story-itos?

Well I might just possibly have one little story. Almost a story. Not quite a story but still something to tell. And it doesn't have to do with him either. It has to do with his sister. And Breh-TOHN. And prom. And Breh-TOHN maybe possibly wanting to be asking her to prom. Ya know... when prom rolls around... And Dani being happy about it.

Very-ito very-it happy-ito :)!

Cuz honestly, they would just be so stinkin' cute together! Ya know what I'm saying? They're just so adorable! And she's so adorable! It's great! Oh I just love love.

Love-ito y'all-ito!
-Dani

(p.s. While we're on the subject... No-ito you-ito can-ito not-ito have-ito my-ito burrito-ito! What-ito do-ito you-ito take-ito me-ito for-ito an-ito idiot-ito?)