It finally feels like summer

I woke up this morning with at least 500 new bug bites from my escapades last night. And then I just layed in bed and did nothing because I don't feel like crossing off one of the million things on my to-do list.  I listened to the Beatles and wrote like 4 pages in my journal but I'm still not caught up to the present, and now it's 11:36 and I haven't showered or done my hair or even changed out of my pajamas.

It must be summer or something.

We had terrific thunderstorm the other day.  Of course we had to run around and get soaked and drag Coleman out of his house because you can't have a thunderstorm without Coleman.  That would never work out.

Soak up some sunshine!

Love and kisses,
Dani

Burns my feet as they touch the ground.

The clock is ticking, ticking, ticking closer to summer and I am the only one left to be excited.  I am the only one left to crave the sunshine and the grass and my long lost friend, sleep.  We haven't seen each other in quite a while.

I discovered something new this year.  After wasting so much time feeling sorry for myself and missing the past and wishing we were still there, I realized that there's nothing wrong with where I'm at.  I realized that it's fine to like Lone Peak sometimes and to maybe even enjoy being at school.  I realized that there are boys with jedi braids and boys with glasses and boys who sing and boys who recycle.  I realized that maybe some of them might even know who I am.  We could even be friends or something.  And you know what?  Maybe I even like where I am better than where I was.

Well I don't want to start feeling sorry for myself when things change.  I can change and I can make friends and I move on.

So I'm excited for a change.  I want to do something new and cut my hair and go thrift shopping and get a tan-line.  Would you care to join?

(Normally I would post some beautiful, inspirational, summer-themed pictures here, but I currently don't have access to the computer where all of my blogging pictures are stored.  Sorry, maybe next time.)

Don't be afraid to change.

Love and kisses, 
Dani


(post script:  So Brynn, I had this great idea where maybe we should meet all of these people Rocky talks about all the time and then we'll know who he's talking about...)

Wishes

I was going to write some of my wishes but I can't remember any of them.

Isn't that strange? That I spend most of my day wishing for things that probably won't happen, but now I can't even remember what they are. I think there's a moral here:

This too shall pass and all will be well.

And not only will all be well, but you probably won't even remember why you were so upset in the first place.

I'm not very good at painting my nails.

Stay Strong.

Love and kisses,

Dani

(p.s. Ariel, do you know if Tami is having class in the summer?)

Oh my goodness guess what I did this weekend? Guess, guess, guess(You're never going to guess)! I went to Nuvo! I know, you have no idea what that is, but that's okay. Let me tell you about it.

Nuvo is a dance convention.

You dance all day and all night, (insert short sleeping break here) then wake up very very early to compete, then dance all day and all night again. It's pretty much my very most favorite thing in the world. Especially since I got to take class from wonderful, amazing, beautiful people (um Stacey Tookey, and Travis Wall, and Sonya Tayeh)!

I know, I know, you're so jealous!

Just kidding, probably you have no idea who I'm even talking about. It's okay, they're just choreographers on So You Think You Can Dance, that's all.

Let me just say, Sonya is maybe my favorite person ever. She's just the kind of person who I wish was my best friend.

Work harder.
Laugh louder.
Sing bigger.
Dance stronger.

I love you all!

Love and kisses,
Dani

This Is Home

I was just sitting there, minding my own business (just so you know, your business is my business... I was actually blogstalking people) when I happened across a lovely post about life. About how wonderful it is to be alive. To be alive and to be here and to be the people we are. This isn't a new idea to me; I feel this way all the time, but suddenly something just hit me.

I wouldn't go back.

Now this is a novel idea for me. I've never thought that before. I miss last year, I miss musical theater, I miss concert singers, I miss the girls that were on my company last year, I miss Mrs. Asay's class and our little french family, I miss summer, I miss efy, I miss the thunderstorms and shooting stars, and most of all, I miss all the friends that went to my school last year but don't anymore.

My problem though, was that I wasn't content just to miss all of this, I had to spend all my time wishing it was still here. Wishing I could go back in time and do it all over again. And over and over and over and it would never ever end.

But now I realize that I don't want to go back in time. I still miss the same things, but I can't do anything about it.

And guess what?

I like the way things have turned out. I like the person I am becoming and I like the new friends I'm making. It's okay for life to be different now than it was. It's okay for things to change

Be happy!

Love and kisses

-Dani

everything's gonna be alright

dark room full of people, and lights flashing on the walls, the ceiling, people's faces. everyone is laughing, singing, dancing along with the music but i can't seem to say anything. so i stand awkwardly, too far away from you. i don't speak, you don't speak and we wait in silence until i am dragged away. i'm scared to make the first move, but scared that you won't, and i wish i could know what you're thinking.

how is it that you can be disappointed even if you have very low expectations?

but then i turn, you smile, you speak, we dance, we talk, we laugh, we hug, and when you walk away, i'm still smiling.

I'm not very good at giving up.

Not about things I care about anyways. I say I'm giving up. And I pretend to give up. But in the dark, to myself, I have a hard time letting go of things sometimes.

Because I'm crazy? Yeah.

Because I'm setting myself up for more disappointment? Yeah.

Because it would be a stupid thing to do? Yeah. I'm good at doing those stupid things sometimes.

Because I'm a secretly a dreamer? Yeah.

Because I might still believe in fairytales? Maybe.

Because I still want a fairytale. Definitely.

Here's a song for you.

DREAMER

Kari Kimmel

It was a bit awkward.

I want a record player. Really really bad. And how about a typewriter too.

Um, can someone teach me to do my hair like this? Because I love it. I tried it once but it didn't quite work out.

I am so tired, you guys. It's not even funny (well maybe it is... yes it is, it's quite ridiculous actually). I skipped first period today because I was too busy sleeping. I used to do that all the time last year, but I actually have to be in class this year. Sometimes I just need a break though. Sometimes I'm tired of being strong and doing what I'm supposed to. So I don't.

Sometimes I get tired of being brave too, but I'm not quite there yet. I'll let you know when that happens and then you can hear all about my deepest darkest fears.

Speaking of fears: I have a deep emotional fear of the library at Lone Peak. I'm not sure what it is, I just am scared of it. I mean, I'm a big fan of libraries in general. I love books, and I love libraries because it's basically just a room full of books. I'm just scared of this particular library.

Well anyways, I had to go in the library at Lone Peak today because I needed the librarian to sign a form so that I could get a BYU library card, which she did. After she signed it, she asked me what the topic was that I couldn't find books for and I told her (it's the history of the American Medical Assosiation by the way). She told me that they had a book for that, and offered to show me where it was. Not knowing how to tell her that I didn't want the book, I followed her over to the book shelf. She pulled a massive medical encyclopedia off of the shelf and dumped it in my arms, then told me that I couldn't check it out, and that I would have to read it there. Well I didn't even want the book in the first place so I just kind of set it awkwardly back on the shelf and walked towards the exit to make my speedy getaway.

Unfortunately, I was walking towards the emergency only exit and had to turn around, walk back past the librarian, and exit through the other door.

It was awkward.

(speaking of awkward, that's actually one of the few things I know how to say in sign language)

Lots of love,
Dani

Go to google.com

Type "Who's the cutest?" into the search box.

Click the "I'm feeling lucky" button.

Smile!

Now go hug someone.

Fact. I was secretly disappointed when I turned 11 and never got a Hogwarts acceptance letter.

Fact. Sometimes I throw temper tantrums. But only to myself.

Fact. This is my 4th attempt to post on this blog today.

Fact. I can't think of what to say.

Fact. I don't like cottage cheese.

Fact. I don't like it when my bedroom door is open.

Fact. I made a new(well sorta) friend(well kinda) today. Actually and old friend(kinda) that I haven't talked to in years. And we just sort of talked to each other.
Here take a picture. I thought it was pretty.

Once we decorated the Feilbach's driveway with chalk once. I wrote everyone's names all big and beautiful and Brenna drew a magic unicorn with a very long rainbow tail that wrapped around everyones names. It was one of the best things I've ever done. I kind of adore sidewalk chalk.

(p.s. i also wrote his name really tiny in the corner... in yellow)